Since I became old enough to ponder, I have wondered variously about life. About what exactly the essence of life is? I have wondered about life and its complexities; life and its simplicities. About pre-life, life and after-life. Life with the future coming a day at a time and receding in like manner, so it becomes what is known as the past. Life and the men who live it, and those who live in it. To some it is kind, and to others, very cruel. It could be fair and easy, and also mean and hard almost simultaneously. It could be a long tortuous journey yet for some, a rollercoaster. It could start well and end on a very low note, yet it could have been the other way. At the same time it could start well, end well or start sour and end sadly. Sometimes I am tempted to be convinced that life is all vanity, and the hereafter; whatever it may mean. Yet some other time I could not but acknowledge the presence and potency of a higher power. Yet again, situations there are when I get so confused I just leave the matter be. But what is it about this life?
Some people pray and get what they want almost at the instant; others fast, keep watch and pray, yet nothing happens. There are times I come upon blessings I neither dreamt of nor prayed for, and I thank the heavens for its showers. Some other time, I am constrained to ask God why I am being burdened with a load that should not have been mine to carry. I have questioned God why life had been so cruel to me. I have also had cause to rejoice almost at the same time in the knowledge that my situation was far better than for some of my fellow travelers. I look at some people and wonder where they are running to, and why they keep going from height to height; while some other I query if they ever came across the word "ambition" or "aspiration". I have been moved to believe that my growth and advancement in life was stunted but when I think it over, I give all thanks for the stride and distance achieved so far. I look at my friends and wonder why a few are ahead of the larger rest who, most atime are far behind. Is this what life is all about?
A new born baby is like a brand new computer system. Complete with all the units and necessary accessories. A device, which if not well configured will end up being just an array of worthless boxes and machines. I get configured at birth, and in the course of time reconfigured, upgraded and even updated; and when I begin to grow near a state of perfection, then I die. I have seen it happen so many times such that it has become a part of the ordinariness of my every day. At death I go back to nothingness. I become a part of space, a piece of history, faded memory or just dead and forgotten. Completely forgotten. Or did I hear someone say "face judgement?" We are always taught to be good, but bad things happen to good people; many atime, the bad fellows get away with their crimes convinced they are smart. But how do I explain it when bad things happen to little children? Could it be pay back for sins from a previous life? That is if there is anything like that? And as if on cue, we are told it is part of the temptations of life. I have always sought to know what kind of temptation this could be, and more importantly for what end we are being tempted. Why? That everyone will reap what he sows and will ultimately be judged. This brings me to ask if we are really sure there is a world out there whereat judgment shall be delivered on everyone, or is it that we have swallowed what we were told, which had also been told to those before us. It may just be all void outside there! Then a whisper starts to tell about faith; said to mean a belief in what you do not see. Someone once said life is worth living if only you discover its essence. So tell me, what is this essence of life?
Life is replete with contradictions. The doctor tells me laughter is good but the religionist warns to flee from every appearance of laughter, and pitch tent with sorrow. For only so will I ever gain the character requisite to qualify for paradise. Life and its contradictions: some are rich, others poor, I am black, you white, Maria is beautiful but Joan is ugly. Kunle died before his first birthday but Sani will live to see his great grandchildren. Esther got married at twenty seven and the couple have lived happily ever after but Eliz may never ever get married. Some land juicy employments right after national service, some others do not and may never. These and much more dot the landscape of this contraption called life. Most men are poor for no fault of theirs; the rich ones, for none of their special abilities. Same for the ugly and beautiful, and for all other of the contradictions of life. Unfortunately, all these man exploits for selfish reasons, yet I am prayed to love my brother as myself. My question is if he would love me back as such. I cannot read his mind so how do I know? Remember the heart of man is said to be perpetually evil. Interestingly for all the evils and transgressions of man, God sits back and watches. Waiting for the day of judgement I am taught. My puerile mind therefore asks questions, gets answers I can not put my fingers on and I continue to wonder on the essence of this life, and if there is a God at all somewhere. So what is this thing called life?
The list goes on and on. But does that answer the question?
Talking about faith, and God. Religions hit you in the face wherever you may go, with each claiming to be the super highway to the gates of paradise. Yet when I see what crimes a lot wreck in the name of faith in God, the loving, forgiving, gracious and living Master, I wonder. For this, some souls have given up on faith and God while some put theirs in some living personae. Yet, others bluntly tell me they are dedicated to the devil. How complex this life could be!. But on a serious note, what happens after I leave this contraption? Or will the essence of life been over by then?
Man I am told was made for the sole reason of service to God. I am also told that it is simply for the purposes of multiplication , in order for man to inherit the land. Still, I am told that the essence of life was to satisfy the ego of something they remotely refer to as a higher being or power. I am told the world will someday cease to be, after which all would face judgement. I am told that the death of a man ends his being, and that judgement is a figment of some bigot's imagination. I am also told man will continually reincarnate until he reaches a level of spiritual maturity. After which he would still face judgement. How complex and confounding? But then, is judgement the essence of life?
What is your take on it? If this life is so confusing, is it worthy to believe in another? None has ever been to heaven and back, so none can tell from the benefit of experience what is beyond here. However, my childish mind believes that despite the seeming imperfections of life, it is worthy to live it to the best and be the best you can to yourself and all. Is there a need to prepare for after-life? I believe the answer is yes. So please prepare. As part of preparations for the eventualities of that eventuality they call hereafter, it is safer to believe in that higher power. Per chance there is nothing like heaven or paradise. Per chance there is. If you are not prepared and there is, you are doomed. And if there is not, you lose nothing by your preparedness. As for my puerile mind life is vain so I chose to believe in God, despite all the complexities, contradictions, and the confusions caused by the way of life. This life I believe is an entrance requirement for the life after tomorrow. I wish to qualify, so I would at all times be the best I can, like every hour is the last. The essence of my life I believe is to make heaven.
What about you?
tundekamali
1840hrs.02122008
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